| If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anyth ... |
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| The human race has one really effective weapon, and tha ... |
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| Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, ... |
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| Principles have no real force except when one is well-f ... |
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| In the first place, God made idiots. That was for pract ... |
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| We are chameleons, and our partialities and prejudices ... |
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| The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer so ... |
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| Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambition ... |
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| We have a criminal jury system which is superior to any ... |
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| Work is a necessary evil to be avoided. ... |
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| It is better to deserve honors and not have them than t ... |
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| The report of my death was an exaggeration. ... |
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| Golf is a good walk spoiled. ... |
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| We had the sky up there, and we used to lay on our back ... |
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| I never let schooling interfere with my education. ... |
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| Suppose you were an idiot, and suppose you were a membe ... |
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| The man who does not read good books has no advantage o ... |
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| To cease smoking is the easiset thing I ever did. I oug ... |
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| Humor is mankind's greatest blessing. ... |
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| Some men worship rank, some worship heroes, some worshi ... |
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| Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities. Truth isn ... |
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| The very ink with which history is written is merely fl ... |
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| Describing her first day back in grade school after a l ... |
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| Behold, the fool saith, Put not all thine eggs in the o ... |
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| On his deathbed Death, the only immortal who treats us ... |
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| Lord save us all from old age and broken health and a h ... |
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| The secret source of humour itself is not joy, but sorr ... |
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| Often, the surest way to convey misinformation is to te ... |
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| Man will do many things to get himself loved he will do ... |
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| I was gratified to be able to answer promptly. I said I ... |
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| Let us so live that when we come to die even the undert ... |
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| Irreverence is the champion of liberty and its one sure ... |
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| It is easier to stay out than get out. ... |
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| I must have a prodigious quantity of mind it takes me a ... |
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| A lie can travel halfway around the world while the tru ... |
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| Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day af ... |
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| Love seems the swiftest, but it is the slowest of growt ... |
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| A verb has a hard enough time of it in this world when ... |
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| Language is a city to the building of which every human ... |
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| Nothing so needs reforming as other people's habits. ... |
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| I've come loaded with statistics, for I've noticed that ... |
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| It were not best that we should all think alike it is t ... |
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| It is the difference of opinion that makes horse races. ... |
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| I have a prejudice against people who print things in a ... |
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| Good breeding consists of concealing how much we think ... |
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| Many a small thing has been made large by the right kin ... |
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| When one has tasted watermelon he knows what the angels ... |
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| When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries disappea ... |
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| Why shoudn't truth be stranger than fiction Fiction, af ... |
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| You cannot depend on your eyes when your imagination is ... |
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| Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear - not ab ... |
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| It is by the goodness of God that in our country we hav ... |
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| His ignorance covered the whole earth like a blanket, a ... |
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| If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, ... |
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| Truth is more of a stranger than fiction. ... |
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| Habit is habit and not to be flung out of the window by ... |
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| Quitting smoking is easy, I've done it hundreds of time ... |
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| A house without a cat, and a well-fed, well-petted, and ... |
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| I am not one of those who in expressing opinions confin ... |
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| I cannot keep from talking, even at the risk of being i ... |
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| A man with a new idea is a crank -- until the idea succ ... |
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| A man who carries a cat by the tail learns something he ... |
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| Imagination is always the fabric of social life and the ... |
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| After all these years I see that I was mistaken about E ... |
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| Youth, large, lusty, loving- Youth, full of grace, forc ... |
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| The holy passion of Friendship is of so sweet and stead ... |
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| Friendship is the marriage of the soul, and this marria ... |
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| A classic is a book which people praise and don't read. ... |
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| Don't part with your illusions. When they are gone you ... |
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| It takes your enemy and your friend, working together, ... |
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| Do something every day that you don't want to do this i ... |
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| He would come in and say he changed his mind -- which w ... |
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| The difference between the right word and the almost ri ... |
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| In religion and politics people's beliefs and convictio ... |
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| It's not that I'm afraid to die, I just don't want to b ... |
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| When I was a child people simply looked about them and ... |
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| There are some books that refuse to be written. They st ... |
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| I am an old man and have a great many troubles, But mos ... |
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| Always do right. This will gratify some people and asto ... |
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| There are lies, damned lies, and statistics. ... |
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| If Christ were here now there is one thing he would not ... |
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| A man is accepted into church for what he believes--and ... |
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| Kindness is a language which the deaf can hear, and the ... |
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| When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant ... |
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| Loyalty to petrified opinion never yet broke a chain or ... |
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| There are times when one would like to hang the whole h ... |
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| The rule is perfect in all matters of opinion our adver ... |
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| Work consists of whatever a body is obliged to do. Play ... |
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| The miracle, or the power, that elevates the few is to ... |
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| Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-minde ... |
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| There is nothing so annoying as to have two people talk ... |
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| Whenever you find that you are on the side of the major ... |
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| Facts are stubborn, but statistics are more pliable. ... |
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| Drag your thoughts away from your troubles.. by the ear ... |
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| I am opposed to millionaires, but it would be dangerous ... |
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| I thoroughly disapprove of duels. If a man should chall ... |
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| A classic is something that everybody wants to have rea ... |
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| All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence t ... |
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| Pessimism is only the name that men of weak nerve give ... |
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| I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell you ... |
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| By trying we can easily learn to endure adversity. Anot ... |
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| The man who is a pessimist before 48 knows too much if ... |
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| The fact that man knows right from wrong proves his int ... |
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| Cold If the thermometer had been an inch longer we'd al ... |
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| Few things are harder to put up with than the annoyance ... |
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| Denial ain't just a river in Egypt. ... |
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| It's not the size of the dog in the fight, it's the siz ... |
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| Wagner's music is better than it sounds. ... |
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| Civilization is a limitless multiplication of unnecessa ... |
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| The proper office of a friend is to side with you when ... |
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| Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a ... |
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| Necessity is the mother of taking chances. ... |
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| To be good is noble, but to teach others how to be good ... |
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| Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by ... |
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| Statistics show that we lose more fools on this day tha ... |
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| There are two times in a man's life when he should not ... |
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| One of the most striking differences between a cat and ... |
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| There is no distinctly native American criminal class e ... |
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| Providence protects children and idiots. I know because ... |
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| There is no sadder sight than a young pessimist. ... |
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| Tomorrow night I appear for the first time before a Bos ... |
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| Some people get an eduction without going to college th ... |
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| Go and surprise the whole country by doing something ri ... |
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| The trouble isn't that there are too many fools, but th ... |
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| Religion consists of a set of things which the average ... |
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| We are called the nation of inventors. And we are. We c ... |
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| There is no such thing as the Queen's English. The prop ... |
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| We should be careful to get out of an experience only t ... |
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| What a good thing Adam had. When he said a good thing h ... |
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| What counts is not necessarily the size of the dog in t ... |
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| Few sinners are saved after the fiirst twenty minutes o ... |
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| Be good and you will be lonesome. ... |
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| Everything has its limit--iron ore cannot be educated i ... |
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| Eloquence is the essential thing in a speech, not infor ... |
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| Education consists mainly in what we have unlearned. - ... |
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| Do the thing you fear most and the death of fear is cer ... |
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| Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as ... |
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| An Englishman is a person who does things because they ... |
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| All schools, all colleges have two great functions to c ... |
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| Against the assault of laughter, nothing can stand. ... |
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| It is noble to teach oneself, but still nobler to teach ... |
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| Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, ... |
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| Cauliflower is nothing but Cabbage with a College Educa ... |
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| Work and play are words used to describe the same thing ... |
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| It is discouraging to try and penetrate a mind like you ... |
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| Wrinkles should merely indicate where smiles have been. ... |
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| The billiard table is better than the doctor. ... |
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| A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when th ... |
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| Barring that natural expression of villainy which we al ... |
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| Always acknowledge a fault. This will throw those in au ... |
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| Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no in ... |
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| A man cannot be comfortable without his own approval. ... |
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| Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it. ... |
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| Humor is the great thing, the saving thing. The minute ... |
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| Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The ... |
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| Grief can take care of itself, but to get the full valu ... |
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| I have never taken any exercise except sleeping and res ... |
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| In Paris they simply stared when I spoke to them in Fre ... |
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| I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter s ... |
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| I don't give a damn for a man that can only spell a wor ... |
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| In religion and politics, people's beliefs and convicti ... |
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| It could probably be shown by facts and figures that th ... |
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| It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people t ... |
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| Just the omission of Jane Austen's books alone would ma ... |
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| It usually takes more than three weeks to prepare a goo ... |
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| It is curious that physical courage should be so common ... |
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| It was wonderful to find America, but it would have bee ... |
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| Most people are bothered by those passages of Scripture ... |
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| My mother had a great deal of trouble with me, but I th ... |
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| Often it does seem a pity that Noah and his party did n ... |
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| Part of the secret of success in life is to eat what yo ... |
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| Time cools, time clarifies no mood can be maintained qu ... |
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| There is something fascinating about science. One gets ... |
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| The right word may be effective, but no word was ever a ... |
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| There are people who strictly deprive themselves of eac ... |
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| The worst loneliness is not to be comfortable with your ... |
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| Water, taken in moderation, cannot hurt anybody. ... |
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| Under certain circumstances, profanity provides a relie ... |
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| When you cannot get a compliment any other way pay your ... |
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| I cannot call to mind a single instance where I have ev ... |
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| The radical invents the views. When he has worn them ou ... |
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| He had discovered a great law of human action, without ... |
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| When in doubt, tell the truth. ... |
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| When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether ... |
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| A human being has a natural desire to have more of a go ... |
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| There are several good protections against temptations, ... |
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| Man is the Only Animal that Blushes. Or needs to. ... |
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| The history of our race, and each individual's experien ... |
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| The universal brotherhood of man is our most precious p ... |
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| We are always more anxious to be distinguished for a ta ... |
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| Sane and intelligent human beings are like all other hu ... |
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| When a person cannot deceive himself the chances are ag ... |
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| The radical of one century is the conservative of the n ... |
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| Familiarity breeds contempt - and children. ... |
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| Our opinions do not really blossom into fruition until ... |
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| How little a thing can make us happy when we feel that ... |
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| It was enough to make a body ashamed of the human race. ... |
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| An enemy can partly ruin a man, but it takes a good-nat ... |
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| Training is everything. The peach was once a bitter alm ... |
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| Laws are sand, customs are rock. Laws can be evaded and ... |
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